Have you ever noticed that when we have some emotion, it’s usually about something?
We are annoyed with someone who was rude to us. We are anxious about an upcoming meeting with the boss. We feel depressed about a loved one’s health.
As we sit on the cushion trying to experience the peace and quiet of meditation, our mind sometimes makes things very difficult for us. Yes, the mind likes to think! And it is impossible to tell it to quit.
But there are some thinking patterns that are particularly unhelpful.
~ Having a cluster of thoughts that go round and around like a hamster on a wheel can often make us feel worse about something. Especially if that something is a story we tell ourselves that is connected to anger.
~ Having the mind spin out of control is extremely unhelpful as it can send our anxiety spiraling into the stratospheres.
So when noted Buddhist Teacher tells us to “drop the story, feel the feelings” what she’s really telling us to do is to separate the story we tell ourselves—about how rude that woman was in the grocery store, or how nasty our boss is going to be when we request a raise—from our emotions. We need to drop the story in order to give ourselves the space to take a breath, and to pause. Because stopping yourself from having unhelpful thoughts is the first step in taking control of your mind.
After we have calmed down, after we have taken a deep breath, paused, and waited, we are now in a position to examine our emotions.
In a spirit of gentle inquiry we try to find out why we feel the way we do, if for no other reason that to get to know ourselves a little better.
But examining our emotions can be much more than that. It can be a way into the suffering that we all carry, and therefore a path to healing.
That is what Pema Chödrön means when she tells us to “drop the story, and feel the feelings.”
If you have any comments you would like to share, just drop them below.
Namaste.
